A Facebook friend of mine, a gay man, has said repeatedly that if his parents were alive, he would have to disown them because they would vote for Trump. "But I thought your relationship was, um...rocky...anyway, the way you talked," I commented once. He said that yes, he had once gone 15 years without speaking to them.
And while it might be a relief for me to not see my angry, homophobic uncle who bullied me as child (if it were possible without cutting my grandparents out of my life), that sounds a little extreme to do to my own parents.
My mom does not like the Clintons, and she thinks that the president does not have very much power, as it goes. But I can't help feeling like she made a big mistake, which I may have to pay for.
So many people I know are so scared, since the election. Racist and homophobic attacks and harassment have also gone up since Trump was elected. He has emboldened those people.
I'm not sure what the future holds, and I have a feeling that, if he is cleared of the child rape and racketeering charges and is allowed to be president, Trump will do what is best for his many companies, not the American workers. There may be a recession, and already times are getting scarier for LGBT people and minorities.
But for the past couple of months, I've had the feeling that I should prepare for harder times, by stocking up on food and saving as much money as possible. And we have a few months of warning, at least economically.
I have trouble accepting that my mom voted this way, even though Clinton is definitely not ideal. But I also think of how many things she does for me, and how enjoyable our relationship is otherwise. She made a good point about marriage--that the only decision of the Supreme Court to be overturned, other than the racist ones, was Prohibition. Though, like I said, one never knows what could happen, so we must try to prevent disasters and injustice as best we can (even, I feel, in our voting).
And if her rights were controversial, they would be my highest priority when voting.
It will take some time to get over this, but I will eventually feel somewhat better--unless something happens, and they actually can keep their outrageous, homophobic campaign promises. I have to admit it will be harder to get over it, if my mother really did make a mistake that I have to pay for. Even though I'll always love her, and she makes my life easier and better in many ways.
Right now, I'm scared, though not as scared as some people I know. The man mentioned above thinks that both marriage equality and Roe vs. Wade will be overturned forever. I am a little afraid of finding someone to love and not being able to marry her, but I'll deal with the changing of laws as they happen. Right now, I just got to focus on my own life, and the little things in my life.
Even though I'm scared, and even though it's difficult right now sometimes, my relationship with my mom is still the best relationship in my life. I love her, and she loves me, and there's never been any question of that. Maybe my Facebook friends don't understand that. But even my biggest fear in coming out as bisexual to her was that it would be weird for her, not that I would lose her. (Apparently, it's not weird for her at all, from what she's said.)
I hope the next few months will calm my fears, as it becomes apparent that they can't do all they wanted to. In any case, I just got to focus on surviving the next four years--one day at a time. It might get rough, but LGBT people have survived far worse even than the more-dangerous situation we have right now. It probably won't get much worse than the 1950s and before. And even if it does, we have many more allies now, so it probably won't be as bad as 1940s Germany. I just hope that LGBT kids are all right, and have access to resources other than their homophobic parents.
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